In the Mirror

Mother Nature seems to be riding a roller coaster. We thought spring had finally arrived – even the robins showed up to reinforce that – and then, we woke up to snow and cold weather. Again. Granted, the snow melted as soon as it hit the ground, and accumulations were minor. But the point is that we have winter weather again, and that sucks.

Oh well. There’s nothing I can do about it. I don’t have to like it, but since I can’t change it, I guess I have no choice but to accept it.

Life is like that, too. There are things we can control, and things we can’t. We can only accept or change what we can control; the rest, we have to let go of. This applies to virtually every situation we find ourselves in: we might not be able to control the situation itself, but we can control whether we respond or react, and how we respond or react.

Such deep thoughts at not even 4 in the morning…

I’ve been learning a lot, lately, about control, and about when I have it and when I don’t. I’ve also been learning that it’s okay to not be in control of everything all the time, and that asking for help in those types of situations doesn’t make me a failure in any way. Having been raised to strive for perfection despite the impossibility of achieving that, learning how to be human is proving to be quite a challenge. There are all kinds of feelings coming up that I’m not sure how to cope with, and that makes the process of change all the more difficult. But, I know it’s for my own good, so I’m doing my best to accept that and learn how to be okay with being imperfect.

Ironically, this very thing is one of the aspects of my job – and one of the reasons why I love my job so much. Yes, I get frustrated with clients sometimes, but that’s because I recognize that they’re mirroring me, and I don’t like to see that side of myself. That, too, is a human thing, and it’s okay to experience it.

Yeah, life is definitely quite the teacher. And I’m okay with that.


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